Ohyeah, it was awesome! There's really two parts to this story: what happened from 11am Saturday to 4pm Sunday, and what happened from 12.30am to 415am Sunday.
I shall start with the first.
So I showed up around 8am and did my business. 90mm prime isn't very good for taking anything other than portraits; too inflexible, though the bokeh is amazing! Changed to my 18-200mm later on and stuck with it for the rest of the camp. The camps went for their 'pasar malam' so I disappeared and had breakfast in the SAC. The primers were quite excited to see me and hear that I was going along for the hike, while the Year 3s gave me the cold shoulder, so I decided to stick with the former.
They had their room-checking-in thing and standardisation thing, during which I hung around and chatted with some primers about discipline standards and how they were gonna stick with the 11am deadline for everything. I noticed the Y2s were still sluggish in moving about, so I guess the shoutings and push ups did them good.
Anyway, the briefings and whatevers took place, and I found a pair of PE shorts in my locker that I could wear so I didn't have to walk and cycle in my uncomfortable berms.
Nic Lim was quite enthusiastic about my presence, and he half asked and half begged me to join his group together with Joshua Chee and with Alison Low as the group occifer (LOL). I agreed, so there began my adventure with group 10.
I originally intended to group-hop, so I could get pictures of everyone doing everything, but soon I found myself just following one. After we set off from ECP macdonalds, we took a wrong turn and ended up separated from the rest of the gang until lunch. During this time, I was just lagging behind and enjoying the scenery, and to the Sec 2s there I was the (I quote) "photographer guy". I didn't really think much of them and neither did they of me but over lunch I got to know them, and for the rest of the day I was talking to them, cracking jokes and sharing stories. I noticed that the group primers (and Alison -.-) didn't really talk much to them, so I helped them along with navigation and stuff. Soon I realised they 'accepted' me into the group (they offered me an oreo) so I became more comfortable with them and helped them out more with navigation. Toward the end I led them the last 4 km to the campsite 'cuz it was getting dark and the route was pretty tricky :) By that time I think they were quite happy with me because I managed to get them there quickly without getting lost.
I never really expected to grow close to them, but by the end of the day I had grown quite attached. I promised some other people that I would join their groups the next day during the bike hike, but I ended up following group 10 instead. Sorry guys :)
So anyway the rest of the night was kind of a blur, cuz I was hot and sticky and hungry. There was tent pitching, then something, then worship and supper. After I finally had time to eat my MRE (glutinous rice with chestnut chicken, yum yum!) and drink my Milo, I felt very sleepy, but had to hang around until the rest went to bed. I spent an hour or so just chatting with the sec 2s, talking about why I was there and other random things.
It was here that I realised that I probably knew more sec 2s than sec 1s. =\
After the sec 2s went to bed I went to the playground to play on the swings, only to find some of the officers there playing. It was quite comical seeing them play on the playground like oversized children trying to have fun. It was really peaceful and fun swinging to and fro in the middle of the night. I wish my life had more times like these.
After that I retired onto a groundsheet which I shared with someone whose identity I shall not mention (let's call him B).
*the next day*
The sec 2s woke up at 5, but I slept till 6. I needed the rest, considering I spent most of the night talking to B. We set off for the bike hike at 7. There isn't much to write about it, except that it was freaking awesome and I had lots of fun with them, even though I fell down once and scraped my shin. Beautiful memories....!
Now on to what happened at night. I slept on the same groundsheet as B, until about 2am when I noticed that I was being bitten by insects quite often. I thought they were mosquitoes or some flying crap, so I used a mozzie patch and thought it would go away. I drifted in and out of sleep, until I was awoken by a sudden burst of heat near my face, and the the sound and smell of something burning. It was freaking scary, I tell you. Freaking. Scary. It turned out that there was a major ant infestation in that area, and B, being the typical B that he is, was using his insect repellent and lighter to create a flamethrower to roast the six-legged pests. I guess he figured that ants were afraid of repellent and fire, so combining the two would be more effective.
I got up and joined him in his quest to exterminate the buggers, wielding my water pack and washing them away (quite ironic that we used water and fire at the same time). After we cleared the area, neither of us wanted to sleep there anymore, so we walked over to a bench and sat down. We ended up talking for about an hour and a half, until about 4am.
He told me about his life in IB: the changes from last year and all the problems he had gone through. It was a very sombre and emotional talk; a side of B I had never seen before. The topic of life and death was discussed freely. He questioned the meaning of life, and the reason why he was doing what he was doing at LDC. When I asked him which people mattered to him most, he said his sec 2s, and in particular one person (let's call him A).
Interesting thing to note: everything that he told me I had thought through myself, and it is also exactly how I feel. I always wonder what I live life for. What am I here for? Who am I here for? I have always wanted someone to love, who loves me back. Isn't it the most beautiful thing in the world to love someone who loves you back?
But, I always ask myself, will it last forever? Because we all know that very few friendships really last a lifetime. And with the end of something beautiful comes hurt. Deep, heart-wrenching hurt that really makes you feel terrible, terrible. And no one ever wants to feel that way.
I have a theory: that B was once very good friends with someone, let's call this person C, and the reason he is in the state he is in now is because this friendship with C ended abruptly.
This led me to ask myself if I was heading down the same road: being so close to a friend such that his departure would render my life meaningless. Love is like a drug, in a way. It feels awesome, but when you suddenly lose it then you feel like hell. Literally. Hell. It sucks.
I have two such friends, let's call them Y and Z. They have, in the short span of a few months, become such a big part of my life. I talk to them daily, and quite honestly I cannot imagine my life without them.
But I know that it cannot last. We will grow up and we will drift apart. As much as I don't want that to happen, I know that it is inevitable. We cannot continue talking to each other every day. One day we will have to move on with our lives. Why do such beautiful things have to come to an end? What shall happen to me then?
What is the meaning of life? Do I live for myself or for others? I cannot live for others, because humans are fallible and will fail me. But yet again, what is life for if not to spend with others? I have been given the gift of love, and for me not to love anyone would be impossible, yet for me to love others it would only end in pain.
As I am typing this, A, Y and Z are still having their camp. I hope that one day they will come to understand the love that people like B and me, their seniors, have for them. It is inexplicable, but it is real. It may sound stupid, but it is not. Maybe one day, when you have your own juniors, you will understand.
-Jont
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