exams, and more

exams.

a tumultuous period, as usual. i have the pressure to perform, not from others (maybe my mum, a bit) but from within. that's good, i suppose. i want to do well.

but when i consider the slightly larger scheme of things, mid years is only zero percent. it doesn't impact my future in any way. i could be a complete failure here and still be redeemed overall.

it's comforting, in a way.

i'm particularly worried for math. i didn't put in my 100% for revision (sorry, sir :/ ) and the paper was tough for me. my math teacher's been bugging me about it. i've been bugging myself about it. i know it's important. i want to succeed. i just don't have that drive to do something about it, like practising math two hours a day.

one thing i appreciate about my math teacher is that through the constant teaching and bugging me to do well, he is aware that an education (in school or out) doesn't consist of math alone. while he places an importance on doing well and excelling academically, he doesn't measure the success or failure of a student (or himself) by math grades alone. as a teacher, he spends time nagging me to do better, but on the side, he'd much rather me become a good person who's lousy at math than a consistent top scorer without character.

i think it takes a great teacher to be able to look beyond a student's grades and be more concerned about his character. not that he should utterly neglect academics, but that he should know what is ultimately more important. in the same way, it takes a great student to look beyond studying for tests and striving for grades, and instead to devote time to and be intentional in his pursuit of character development and for spiritual growth.

so if you think about it, my time in school isn't to learn and do well, but to grow as a person and in Christ.

not that math isn't important.

but when i consider the larger scheme of things, my ib certificate and my achievements on earth is only zero percent. it doesn't impact my future in any way. i could be a complete failure here and still be redeemed overall.

it definitely is comforting.

so let's put grades, trophies, money, fame, successes aside and make our lives count for eternity, yes?

not that we should utterly neglect academics, but that we should know what is ultimately more important.

-Jont